Think your relationship is on the brink, but unsure? Here are just 7 signs (and in no particular order) that your relationship is falling apart and what you might want to do to put a spark back into it.
1. There’s A Total Lack Of Affection
The honeymoon stage of the relationship is over, but you didn’t think it would change this much. You have gone to not being able to keep your hands off of each other to literally always intentionally keeping your hands off of each other. No hand holding, cuddling, kiss and certainly no sex. No touching leads to becoming roommates, fast.
2. Terms Of Endearment Are Rarely Used
With the love fading, those “honey”, “babe” and “sweetheart” now become your first name and your first name only. The way you address your partner says so much about your relationship.
3. You Cannot Share What’s On Your Heart & Your Partner Isn’t Being Vulnerable With You
Sharing with each other is a strong indication that you both feel vulnerable. You tell each other whatever you want about anything. There is so much you want to tell your partner, but something or many things are holding you back. A good, healthy relationship includes that comfort, reassurance and help from each other that nothing needs to be held back. Start to rebuild that vulnerability by asking each other about each other’s day, etc., just keep the communication open.
4. Poor Communication (or none at all)
Just going through the motions? Not even acknowledging your partner is also in the house, maybe in the same room. Silence puts a heavy toll on a relationship. No texts, smiles, phone calls or even emails. The silent treatment only builds resentment and a whole lot of other issues.
5. You Don’t Or Want To Spend Time Together
Movie nights, dinner dates, bowling, binge tv watching… out the door! You had them before, but now things have changed. Do you ask over and over to do those types of things and always hear the same reply in your head “they don’t want to spent time with me. “
6. The “Used to” Count Is Increasing
Remember all those things you “used to” do together? It could have been the unexpected hug, getting you a cup of coffee in the morning, a hand- written sticky note showing how you love them. Many of those are just “used to” moments these days.
7. Even When You Are Together, You Still Feel Lonely
Does your partner sit in the same room but are immensely interested in their phone or other things besides you? Time just stands still when you are in the groove, relaxing watching shows, laughing together, just joined at the hip. Time is valuable. How do you want to spend yours when are with your partner?
One way you can fix a failing relationship is rearranging your priorities so your partner comes first. This means before the friends, kids or the dog. Act like how it was when you were dating.
Larry Baumgartner is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in the state of Florida and Founder/Owner of the Trinity Relationship Center. His specialty is helping couples reconnect, rebuild and restore their relationship from affairs/infidelity, communication and relationship issues. Larry offers marriage counseling/couples therapy and individual therapy. For a FREE phone consultation call Larry direct at 727-946-1346. You can schedule your in-person appointment in Trinity, FL or an online counseling appointment from anywhere in Florida at www.TrinityRelationshipCenter.com