In the middle of this pandemic you find yourself single. You want to mingle or at least talk with someone. You find someone you like on a dating site. You do the text, phone call and even video chat thing.
But what is the next step for daters in this new world of ours that is keeping us at a safe distance?
According to research from OkCupid, the dating game has not stopped. Their site saw more than 4 million more intro messages this March compared to last year at that time. There has also been a 20% decrease in daters just looking for hookups.
So, what can you do to advance this potential relationship?
1. Go on a virtual dinner date
Sure, ideally you would be sitting across the table looking at each other dressed up, enjoying great conversation, maybe some flirting, wine and a good meal. On a virtual dinner date you are doing all that excluding the shared table. You could cook the same meal and eat it together through Zoom, Skype or Facetime.
2. Watch a film or TV show together
It would be great to sit next to your new friend on the couch cuddling but during these challenging times you have to make the best of the current situation. One of the first things that comes to my mind is Netflix Party. This platform lets you sync up your Netflix viewing and text chat on the side. Of course, you could also talk on the phone when watching the show together.
3. Cook a meal or make a pizza together
How about cooking a meal together remotely? I know it sounds like a stretch, but it can be done. Choose something to cook, maybe you decide on making pizza. Go to your video chat device and show and tell what each of you are doing. Put on your favorite sauce, sprinkle those toppings you love so much and put it in the oven. While it is cooking, you can spend time talking or whatever to pass the time.
4. Create music playlists
One of the best ways to get to know each other is learning musical tastes. You can create playlists on YouTube and when you are alone and thinking about this new friend, you can play each other’s list. You could even make a mix song list with each of your favorites.
5. Watch a live concert
As I write this, it seems every live concert is cancelled for the rest of the year. But as we know, music brings people together and whether it is karaoke, a live concert or just listening to Pandora or a CD (remember those?) together, it can bring a certain vibe to the room. However, if you are unable to be at a live concert together, you can watch one together live online. I found a couple of options… Wolfgangs.com and YouTube full live concerts . From Billie Eilish to Queen to Radiohead, there are plenty of great shows out there.
6. Talk (Text) Dirty To Me
Even without physical touch and if you are both on board with it, you can still text your sexual thoughts to this new person in your life. You could just as well pick up the phone like the title of a former Poison song and “Talk Dirty To Me.” After you discover some of your partners sexual needs and wants, play time can take place once social distancing is lifted.
As we all know things are changing so fast around us with COVID-19, the rules of engagement change day by day. Beaches are opening up again here in Florida and who knows, maybe by June you can sit in a movie theater once again. Just remember, this is only temporary and we get through all of this, including daters trying to find that new love.
Larry Baumgartner
Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist
(727) 946-1346
reconnect@BestHopeTherapy.com
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